3 Months

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I actually don't sit around counting the days, but I figure it'll be a while before I don't notice "the 26th" of any month... and I'm sure when July 26th rolls around for years I'll think "shit... this would have been our anniversary". And I'll always be reminded of July 5th every time the 4th rolls around and that horrible fucking text/phone call comes painfully to mind. Just a big pile of fucking hurtful memories all through the summer for some time, I guess.

I did have a big planned speech about how you said "I need some time for myself, some time on my own" when I was helping you pack up and move out of my life... yet, here you are, with some other dude just a couple of months after you were supposed to devote yourself to me for life. Sure didn't take you long to "find yourself". Like it was ever about that. Liar.

And I don't know your exact situation... but I'm assuming you don't have full custody of the kids now or anything... in fact, since you were off hanging out on Labor day, the same way you were in a bar with some other dude 5 years ago on the night we first met... it seems like your life is probably exactly like it was when I met you... you just decided to live it with another dick in you.

So many lies.

So, since it's pointless to say much, I'll just keep it simple and say this:

I love you / I fucking hate you.
I wish I could see you / I hope I never fucking see you again.
     (seriously, do us all of a favor and steer clear of where you know I hang out... if I see you and this new guy you're fucking I will lose my shit)
I miss you / I wish I had never fucking met you.
You were the best / You're the second worst girlfriend I ever had.

As I continue to wade through a sea of disappointing people I'm so angry that I have to do this shit again, deal with all this crap that I was happy to have behind me.

Just because you quickly found someone new to fuck and all your financial/hospital worries are taken care of... great... so happy for you... meanwhile I'm still here cleaning up the massive fucking mess you skated away from and left behind from our supposed "life together". Lies.

So many lies.

(So here's one back at you)
So happy for you.


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